Frustrated Incorporated

Observant readers, and especially Guinevere, may have spotted the hidden subtext in the middle paragraph of yesterday's post, and indeed there really was subtext hidden there. The running subplot of this blog has hit something of a snag, and a little while ago I sent out an e-mail that put the kibosh on the roommates thing with you know who. It was the right thing to do. There's really no other way around it.

We had a confrontation of sorts. She challenged me, more or less, to say no. It was a showdown. There was no resolution right there on the spot, but I told her I'd think it over.

Here's how I break this down:
--I like her.
--She knows I like her.
--She likes me, too.
--That scares her.
--She's afraid that one of us is going to severely hurt the other.
--Therefore, becoming roommates with this between us will only lead to disaster.

That's probably true. Living with Shannon was great, but it was also painful and hard, because I really liked her a lot, and may have been all the way in love with her. I'm not going as far as to say that in this case, but I do like Jen a whole awful lot. Living in the same apartment, but not together, would be hard. And she's pulling back, because of her history, because she's been hurt, because she's hurt other people. I could argue this all night and then some, but she's pulling back nevertheless.

So there wasn't a lot of choice there.

No roomies. I'm staying put right here for now.

And there will be some discussion of the rest if I have my way. The reason that she and I don't work out will *not* be because I was too chickenshit to take a chance on the unknown.

But if that's what she wants, I can do that.